Struggling With Your New Year Resolutions? Try Finding Your “Why” Instead

lindapope
6 days ago
2 min read

It’s January 9th.

The motivation you felt at the start of the year has already started to fade.

The resolution that sounded so clear just a week ago now feels… heavy.

Life has crept back in.

Energy is low.

Doubt is loud.

And maybe there’s a quiet thought you don’t really want to admit yet:

“Have I already failed?”

If that’s you, let me gently reassure you of something first:

You haven’t failed.

You might just be chasing the wrong reason.

Motivation Doesn’t Disappear — It Disconnects

We often talk about motivation as if it’s something we either have or don’t have.

But more often, motivation fades when our goals aren’t rooted in something meaningful.

There are two main sources of motivation:

External motivation : This comes from pressure. Wanting to be healthier, more productive, more impressive, more accepted.

These goals are often driven by guilt and “shoulds.”

Internal motivation : This comes from alignment. From a desire to grow, feel grounded, and live more honestly.

These goals are quieter—but far more steady.

"When our actions don’t match what we truly value, motivation doesn’t disappear — it slips away."

Why Resolutions Feel So Hard

Many New Year’s resolutions are built on external motivation.

Not what we truly want—

but what we think we should want.

That can look like:

Exercising because you feel you have to
Quitting habits out of shame rather than self-respect
Starting projects to prove you’re doing “enough”

That kind of motivation rarely lasts.

Especially when life gets busy, tiring, or unpredictable.

If This Feels Familiar…

Before pushing yourself harder, it might help to pause.

Instead of asking, “Why can’t I stick to this?"

Try asking, “Why did I choose this goal in the first place?”

I’ve created a Find Your Why worksheet to help you gently reflect on:

where your goals came from
what truly matters to you
what drains your energy vs. what supports it
how to realign your goals so they feel supportive, not punishing

👉 Download the Find Your Why worksheet here

Find Your Why

(It’s free, and designed to be completed slowly — no pressure.)

Finding Your Why

When your goals are rooted in your internal motivation—your why—they become much easier to sustain.

Your why doesn’t need to be dramatic or inspirational.

It doesn’t need to sound impressive.

A strong why:

feels personal
still makes sense on tired days
connects to how you want to feel, not just what you want to achieve

When goals come from this place, they feel steadier—even when your energy dips.

A Gentle Reminder

This isn’t about fixing yourself.

You’re not broken.

It’s about understanding yourself better—and choosing goals that work with you, not against you.

If Your Motivation Is Gone

You don’t need a new resolution.

You don’t need more discipline.

You might just need a deeper reason.

And if all you can manage right now is reflection, that still counts as progress.

If you’d like support reconnecting with what truly matters to you, the Find Your Why worksheet is there to guide you—one page at a time.