Week 7 - I Wanted To Give Up : A Week Living With Depresssion And Staying Alcohol Free

“Every time you keep going, you prove your strength.”

This is Week 7 of my balanced life reset — a week living with depression, low motivation, and the temptation to quit everything I’ve started. I just wanted to give up.

Not in a dramatic way, but in a quiet, persistent urge to stop trying, stop writing, stop posting, stop pushing myself to change.

I didn’t want encouragement. I didn’t want motivation. I wanted to hide.

And honestly, that’s been the theme for the whole week.

❗ Feeling Numb : Living With Depression And Low Motivation

Depression hit me this week, a heavy fog smothering me leaving me feeling numb, weary and disengaged.

Everything felt much harder than it should. Getting started was difficult. Staying focused was harder. Finishing things felt almost impossible.

There wasn’t a single cause — just a sense of wanting to stop and get some relief from the effort of trying to get through the day and from trying to change my life.

It has been hard to keep seeing why I need to change my life - it's comfortable as it is.

But something sat in my head niggling away at me, telling me not to quit.

I listened and I kept going. Each day has been a slog, each task a chore. But slowly, imperfectly and without enthusiasm, I did make it through the week.

🍷 Alcohol Free Journey : One Week In And Struggling

I’m still on my break from alcohol. It's been a week now and I'm still undecided about whether or not to continue.

A week without alcohol and I've no more clarity or energy than I had before.

Apart from spending less money in the shops, I really can’t yet see any obvious benefits in giving up.

If anything, being alcohol-free has made my low mood more striking.

That’s unsettled me. Given all the hype and advice around the benefits of cutting out alcohol I really hoped quitting would immediately make me feel better.

My desire for a glass of wine is at times overwhelming but something is stopping me from giving in to the craving, and I haven’t abandoned the break.

I need to trust in this journey I've started on and keep all the reasons for doing this close by.

Staying alcohol-free this week felt like an achievement in itself.

💚 Health & Exercise: Doing Something Is Better Than Nothing

I didn’t complete all my planned exercise.

I know that exercise helps my mood — but when I’m low, I seem to avoid the very things that would help most.

I’m noticing that pattern more clearly now. Awareness doesn’t fix it instantly, but it does stop me telling myself stories about laziness or failure.

🤝 Social Life, Small Wins, and Building a Business

Socially, I’ve said yes to attending a single ladies’ Christmas lunch — something I would normally avoid when I’m feeling this low.

I also made resin trinket dishes as gifts, which felt manageable and grounding. Creating something physical helped when my head felt noisy.

On the business side:

• My domain name is now bought.

• I stuck to my schedule most of the time.

• I made real progress with Instagram stories and carousels, Pinterest posts, and LinkedIn updates.

• I continued my website design diploma course.

None of this felt exciting. But it happened — and that matters.

🦋 Trying Something Different - Visualising The Better Me

This week, I started using a daily mantra, hoping that visualising the better version of me will help me keep track of what I'm doing and why. Not affirmations in the hopeful sense, no aspiration to be perfect — but reminders of who I’m choosing to become.

I repeat:

I am the person who does not drink alcohol. I am the person who exercises daily. I am the person who is confident and speaks up. I am the person who speaks French. I am the person who runs a resin keepsakes business. I am the person who is competent with social media.

I don’t know yet if this works. It’s too early to tell.

But on days when I feel disconnected from myself, it gives me something steady to return to.

That’s the Whole Story

There’s no lesson neatly wrapped up this week.

I wanted to give up. I didn’t. That's the whole story.

I stayed with the discomfort. I kept showing up. I didn’t quit the blog, the break from alcohol, or the broader reset.

Some weeks, that’s all there is.

And for this week, that has to be enough.

— Linda